Anyone else ever take statistics and want to run formulas to explain life? I did try at one point during my mid‑life crisis. I was like, wait… can I use statistics to figure out why life sucks so damn much? And the madness started — but halfway there I gave up. I was like, this is pointless. I’m better off going to Alameda and getting me a double of Chico’s Tacos with extra sauce so I can drown my papas fritas in the juice when I scarf down the tacos in like five minutes.
The funny thing is that everyone thinks happiness is a constant — naw bro, that shit is fucken elusive. One day you win 2 dollars off a 5‑dollar scratch‑off, and the next you fucken lose a 50 when buying chapstick at the fucken Family Dollar. Then you go down on your luck and still hand a 20 to the homeless guy who probably has more money than you, and then life throws you a bone — but for you to get all the meat, it becomes a fucken journey.
Yeah, I made 400 baros, but I had to drive 12 hours on fucken steam and hard‑knock lying dreams. Yeah, that shit is true — life doesn’t always give you free happiness without a fucken debt attached to it.
So when life wants to point the finger at you and finger‑blast your whole existence… you don’t take it. You don’t fold. You don’t let life clown you.
You just look that cabrón dead in the eyes and say:
“Naw uh… here. Have a bag of dicks.”
Sinister †Publications 
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